My name's Ashley Mark Pomeroy and I'm a chap. I'm British, and I'm over thirty years old. As a consequence I feel slightly dirty when I use a Wiki like this, because so many of you are fourteen-year-old boys and it's not right for a thirty-year-old man to hang out with fourteen-year-old boys.

From 1999 to the end of 2001 I worked as a freelance writer for Future Publishing in Bath, England, on some of their least successful computer gaming titles. I also wrote two books and spent 2000-2002 working full-time as a copywriter for Loot.com in London. Since then I've moved back to my home town of Salisbury, in Wiltshire, where the living is easy and the cotton is high.

Not a particularly impressive career, but it means that I have nothing to prove to anyone on this wiki! If you have a problem with my edits, you are probably wrong. You are fourteen and you are not emotionally mature. You might be very bright but you're still just a kid. I would describe my feelings for you as a mixture of arrogant contempt and downright hatred; I can hide it, but it makes me angry to do so because I am no longer my own master.

Politically, socially, and in all other respects I am exactly as you would expect me to be. -Ashley Pomeroy 19:25, 27 January 2006 (UTC)